An important truth about girls in red hoods (and wolves)

I went to a story-telling event last night. The Devil's Violin was a fabulous, powerful mix of tale and music. Its passions were part gypsy, part Celtic, part Eastern European... and all magic and mystery!

It reminded me that, though I have been telling tales to tots this autumn, it has been quite a while since I told one of my grown-up stories - one of my Fairy Tales for Middle Age.

So...

Are you sitting comfortably?

Once upon a time (you know how it goes), there was a girl who lived on the edge of a forest with her mother, not far from her granny’s house. This girl was young and pretty and cool, and she had a top with a red hood – and it was not just any old red, either, but a fabulous, flaming crimson!

Now, a red hoody may be okay to wear in the city (wicked!) but it’s a bit of a liability for a girl in a rural area. It makes her rather too conspicuous. We know for sure that this lass is going to attract attention, and probably get herself into a spot or two of bother. R-E-D spells Trouble, with a capital T.

One day, Red’s mother sent her to her granny’s with some lunch in a basket, and some stern Laying-Down-the-Law words about staying on the path, avoiding poisonous mushrooms and all sorts of other dangers (yada yada, yeah yeah - you’ve heard it all before!) and Not Talking To Strangers.

Well, you know, Ma could have saved her breath, ‘cos Red – like any girl dressed so symbolically – couldn’t, or wouldn’t, quash her curiosity. Everything caught her attention: birds and butterflies, spiders and slugs, favourite flowers and unfamiliar fungi, strange smells and intriguing noises through the trees. She soon wandered off the path …

… And, pretty soon, of course, Red met a WOLF.

The Wolf was huge, hairy and scary, sharp-toothed and dangerous … but also (you know it’s true!) very interesting … and more-than-a-little exciting. So Red just couldn’t resist it: she chatted with the Wolf. And where’s the harm, eh, in just a few words … and maybe a teeny, weeny bit of flirtation?

And the Wolf (did I say he was smart, too?) didn’t ask any suspicious questions or make any inappropriate suggestions at all. So Red was soon happy to tell him exactly what she was doing and where she was going. You may say she was naïve; but personally, I’d say she rather wanted to Play with Fire …

Soooo … Red and the Wolf agreed to race. And before long (let’s cut to the chase like the Wolf) granny is gone – all eaten up – and Red and the Wolf are going through that well-known What-Big-Eyes/Ears/Teeth-You-Have routine.

And there’s Red, leaning over the bed - leaning over the wolf - staring intently into his deep, dark eyes …

Just beginning to wonder (I’ll bet!) whether teeth like that can possibly have Honourable Intentions …

… When – TA RAAA! …

In rushes the Woodcutter – dressed for action - axe in hand – and chops off the Wolf’s head! Whizz, thump!

“You’re safe now!” crows the Woodcutter. (And perhaps we can forgive him for feeling just a little bit smug and self-satisfied, under the circumstances).

However …

“You idiot!” retorted Red (unexpectedly, you may think). “You blithering, blinking idiot!” (tho' I’m afraid she may have been less polite). “I had the situation totally under control!”

“But - but -” spluttered the woodcutter, inarticulately.

“Wolves get a bad press,” the furious Red continued, “They’re not as tough as they make out. I could’ve handled him! And in any case – it was my problem, and you should’ve left me to sort it out!

“I – I – ” spluttered the woodcutter, still lost for words (and let’s face it, he’s only a secondary character, and he’s lucky to have any kind of speaking part at all).

“Hasn’t anyone ever told you people need to learn to deal with their own mistakes?!” demanded Red.

But the woodcutter (who had never watched daytime TV or read Iron John) just scratched his head and said nothing.

“Don’t you realise,” Red ranted on, “How important it is for me to learn to deal with wolves myself?! After all, my family has a history of dysfunctional behaviour when it comes to wolves, y’know – and I don’t want to repeat their mistakes!

"My Mum can’t cope with ‘em at all: she’s too scared even to leave the path! And look at Granny! She never learned to handle ‘em either: she was so scared she took to her bed! But she couldn’t even recognise one when it crawled in beside her, and you know what happened to her!”

And Red turned sadly to gaze at the undeniably nasty mess on the bed.

“I don’t mean to sound ungrateful”, she said at last, “But wolves can’t be avoided. You have to learn to deal with them. And now that you have deprived me of an Important Learning Experience, I am just gonna have to go out and find more wolves, aren’t I? It’s a hassle”.

So she did.

And although we shall never know what happened to her, we can be pretty sure some of it was Trouble, and I think it’s quite possible she got eaten in the end. But it's certain that things happened to her along the way – which is, without a doubt, what any girl with a Red Hood wants.

Flow x

© 2008

Spread some warmth!

Eee but it's cold out there - look at the frost! (This was on the bonnet of a car we passed on the way to school yesterday).

How-so-ever, out of the blue, I have received two little nuggets of cosmic warmth; real chestnuts of unexpected and un-asked-for positivity!

The first was from someone who enjoyed a comment I'd left on a bulletin board. Though we'd never met or even talked, he emailed me just to say "Thanks for the humour!"

The second was another email, this time from a guy called Chris who runs the Facebook group 'Optimists Unite! Freedom for Happiness!'. He sent round a message to group members, just to spread some love. Here's part of it:

"I wonder if you realise, just how beautiful you are? Without you, the world would be incomplete. If you've ever felt alone, then you'll know how important it is to show how much you care. If you've ever felt helpless, then you know how it is to feel alone.

"The whole is always greater than the sum of its parts. We're all here for each other, and together we are stronger. Don't let lies tear us apart and weaken our resolve. Let truth bring us together so that we can truly evolve.

"Honesty is Love for yourself. Truth is love for others. Be true to yourself and honest to the people around you, and great things shall befall you... for you are sublime.

"The truth is... you are beautiful. You are the most caring, understanding, and wise person I know. I know this because I only know one... I know myself, and I know that we are of the same spirit, devoid of ego.

"Love yourself unconditionally: Heal the spirit. Love others unconditionally: Heal the world".

How wonderful it felt to be given some appreciation, optimism and inspiration when I least expected it. What's more, I'd been having a down-patch, and was more-than-ever in need of some warmth.... And along came these guys, helping to re-ignite a little spark of spirit! They were certainly making the flow more sparkly!

It gave me a boost of energy, and I was able to pass on some of the positivity to other people, through my own little acts of appreciation. Maybe this post will do the same for you. Go on ... Tell someone you know that they are wonderful ... I dare you!

Flow x

The end of flat-packs and pick'n'mix

Bear with me today, folks: this blog starts with misery, and moves on through rant, but it ends with some hope!

So, Woolworths and MFI have gone bust.

It's big news, and it has put the wind up a lot of people. And indeed, it's hard to imagine the high street without Woolies or the retail park without MFI, isn't it? A Britain without flat-packs and pick'n'mix!

These retail giants follow the Banks, as the latest victims of the credit crunch. And it seems likely that they won't be the only ones: PC World and Comet are apparently at risk too. "Weep for Woolies" says the BBC's political editor Robert Peston today, rather too sentimentally for my liking. Personally, I don't give a toss for the corporate casualties. It's the human casualties I'm sorry for: at least 30,000 individuals will lose their jobs as these companies go bust. And they will suffer all the more, no doubt, because almost all of them are already in debt.

Now beware, listen to the sirens blaring: here is a Rant Alert!

The trouble is, for the past decade or more, we've built our whole society on credit. Almost all of us do it: mortgages, loans, overdrafts, hire purchase, credit deals, credit cards, store cards ... we've got into the habit of casually building up debt. We've got so used to it that we don't even think any more about what credit really is. Let me spell it out: credit is money we haven't got.

If that's not shocking enough, here's something worse: the collapse of the banks and big business makes it frighteningly clear that they, too, have too much debt and not enough money. And if we haven't got the money, and they haven't got the money, then there's only one conclusion to draw: the money isn't there!

Yup, this is the bizarre truth behind the credit crunch: we have all been spending non-existent money! No wonder we're in trouble!

But this (at last!) is where I begin to feel the little first flickering flame of hope.

Andrew Lansley wasn't allowed to say it but I can (I am not a Tory politician AND I earn a lot less than the UK average wage, so I can say what I want) ... Recession might be good for us.

Of course, it's going to be Bad for many individuals. It's going to be Bad for those who lose their jobs or their houses. It's going to be Bad for those who suffer with stress and stress-related illnesses. And I'm sorry for all of them.

But maybe, just maybe, there will be some Good side-effects.

You see, I think we've been spending money we haven't got (and that's never a good thing) on things we don't need. So many of us have got into the habit of believing we need that second car, or that conservatory extension, or those designer clothes, or those packaged ready meals, or that wide-screen telly, or that extra games console ... and we don't. Really, we don't.

Now, I'm not a puritan. I'm all for splurging on wine and chocs and holidays and fun and beautiful things. And I wouldn't complain - not for one moment - about all this unnecessary consumption if it was doing any good or making people happy, but it isn't.

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Huge numbers of people - probably the majority - work in jobs they hate to pay for these things that they don't need. Huge numbers of people are perpetually anxious, worrying about whether they can re-pay the credit they have accumulated. Huge numbers of people are miserable, and all their extra possessions do not make them happier.

So maybe, just maybe, as the recession bites and we have less money to spend, some of us will wake up and remember: "Hey: money won't buy me happiness, and money can't buy me love!"

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And if so (since I'm really a hippy and anarchist at heart) then I say maybe this credit crunch will be the end of the world as we know it... But I'll feel fine! Because a Britain without flat-pack and pick'n'mix is hard to imagine right now, but it might just be a better one!

Flow x

Mushrooms, mists and musings

I don't much like autumn, usually.

It never feels like a season of mists and mellow fruitfulness to me. It's too depressing. All that rain, decay and darkness. When all hope of a late Indian summer has gone, I feel bereft - almost betrayed; and when the clocks go back, I rage, rage against the dying of the light.

But this year something seems to have changed. I am looking at autumn with different eyes.

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Suddenly, the colours seem incredibly beautiful, and the sky seems higher, and the cold seems (what's the word?) brazen - like it is daring us to shake our heads and wake up.

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If you look at my pics, I hope you'll see what I mean.

For the first time, as autumn advances and winter creeps towards us, I feel something like relief as well as sadness. It seems the leaves are letting go, not falling! It feels like the out-breath after the in-breath; the ebb after the flow.

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And for the first time, I actually believe that spring and summer will come again!

I wonder if this means I'm getting old?!

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Flow x

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(© 2008 - All photos)

Cowgirls and charity shops

I've made a wonderful accidental discovery. It's like walking home in the fog 'cos you've missed the last bus, and finding a waterfall en route. Or looking up 'serious' in the dictionary and finding 'serendipity' instead. Or going to the dentist, and finding they're hosting a circus today.

I wandered into my local charity shop looking for something new to read. Something caught my eye: the silver cover was vaguely appealing, the blurb was vaguely amusing, and the title was vaguely familiar. So I handed over my 40p and took the book home.

But there's nothing even vaguely vague about 'Even Cowgirls Get the Blues'. It's as In Yer Face as a book can get, without being arrested for prostitution.

Have you read it? It's funny and rude and crazy and wise. Its plot is thin, but its ideas are profound - that Tom Robbins knows a thing or two. There's a lot of pure silliness and plenty of wanton, gratuitous sex to keep Middle England tutting. What's more, its characters are people I'd want as my friends, and it had me laughing out loud on the train and grinning broadly at strangers. It's a bumpy ride in fantastic company.

And d'you know what? It's all about go-going with the flow!

Flow x

P.S. I've just found this on boingboing.net - a surreal image of leaves that got embedded in tarmac - 'tis a kind of modern urban fossil!

When 'going with the flow' just isn't joyful enough

A few people have asked me about the title of this blog. Why 'go-go' with the flow, they ask, and not just 'go'?

'Going with the flow' is a notion most of us are familiar with, even if we're not very good at actually doing it. Going with the flow means taking life as it is, accepting what comes your way, not fighting battles that can't be won and not yearning for things that can't be had.

It's a wise idea that goes back thousands of years. There's no surer way to make yourself unhappy than to want things (that's possessions and events) that you don't have. Lao Tzu may have been the first to put it into words, in the Taoist classic the Tao Te Ching:

"There is no disaster greater than not being content; there is no
misfortune greater than being covetous... In being content, one will
always have enough" (45:105).

Now, I'm not the best person to come to if you want to learn more about going with the flow. Try websites like this instead. I often find it hard to accept things that come my way - and I'm especially likely to stomp and fight if I think something is unfair. That's one reason I didn't call this blog just 'Go with the flow'.

You see, I believe in 'the flow'. I'm quite passionate about it, really. I won't try to define 'the flow', here, because that would lead me into deep philosophical discussion, and it's too early in the morning for that! Please just let me get away with using shorthand for now and saying that I mean some kind of interconnected everythingness.

My important point is that I believe we are the flow and we make the flow.

I'm sure I don't need to work hard at convincing anyone that there is a lot of shit around. That was the subject of my very first post, and it's the reason I started this blog. But the thing is, I think that all this unpleasantness - all the war, famine, violence, cruelty, nastiness and unhappiness - is doing the psychic equivalent of polluting the flow.

We're all swimming here together, I'd like to say, so don't piss in the water!

And because I believe that we all create the flow we're floating in, I want to do my bit to make it as joyful and good as possible. I want to add laughter to the Universe, and beauty, and usefulness, and hope.

For me it's not good enough to just 'go with the flow' - I want to help that water sparkle!

So now I'm off to enjoy the sunshine, and do some go-going in today's flow! And I hope you can do the same!



Flow x

Penguins

I must just share this with you...

Penguins.

Yes, I said penguins!

As my friend Scribblemoose says, "It's hard to take life too seriously when you're watching penguins. So silly, so beautiful and so very full of joy".

Penguins, it seems to me, are absolutely the best role models for go-going with the flow! Thank you, Scribblemoose!



Video and photo - copyright to Scribblemoose 2008.

And here's a link to another fabulous piece of artistic silliness ... a melting icecream van, which I found quite by chance on Boingboing.net, which describes itself as 'a directory of wonderful things' and is apparently the most popular blog in the world!

Flow x